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ENTERTAINMENT

You’ll Go Crazy Over Bates Motel

by Michael Tyminski

Freddie Highmore and Vera Farmiga in Bates Motel (source: A&E)
Freddie Highmore and Vera Farmiga in Bates Motel (source: A&E)
Freddie Highmore and Vera Farmiga in Bates Motel (source: A&E)

Bates Motel: Monday’s at 10p.m., A&E.

Throughout the history of the horror genre, we’ve seen our fair share of notable villains. From Jigsaw of Saw who simply sees self-mutilation as the means to appreciating one’s life for the better, to the seemingly immortal Michael Myers of Halloween fame to Jason Voorhees at Camp Crystal Lake, we see the end result of years of psychological illness in the form of a machete and some poor misguided co-eds.

However, Bates Motel asks, what turns these people into our most beloved serial killers? It does so by following around iconic slasher Norman Bates during his teenage years in a prequel to the Alfred Hitchcock classic. This means we will get a glimpse into Norman’s family life, as Norman was always horror’s preeminent mama’s boy.

Our first episode revolves around Norman moving to White Pine Bay and getting adjusted into this new location, trying to get a new start six months after the death of his father. Norman is the sort of nice shy boy that girls seem to take to fairly easily, and his teachers want him to get involved in the school’s athletics (particularly the track team). His mother Norma however, is guilt-tripping him at every turn, claiming she needs him at the Motel all the time. This eventually leads to Norman sneaking out of his house to go to study only to end up at a house party.

The second subplot revolves around a man whom returns to the plot Norma bought in order to “take back his property”. While Norman is out at said party, the man returns, trying to rape Norma. Norman walks in at the last second and smashes him over the head with a iron, which leads to Norma killing him soon thereafter before spending a day or two figuring out where to stuff the body and hiding it from the cops (one of the best whimsical moments of the pilot involved the Sheriff giving Norma a puzzled look as to why she named her son after herself).

The main pairing of Norman and his overbearing mother Norma Louise Bates (as played by Freddie Highmore and Vera Farmiga respectively) are both played excellently, particularly Farmiga as Norma Louise Bates, playing the sort of unsettling, unstable, mother that leads a man down the road to insanity. Norman is played as a sweet gawky teenager who hasn’t been completely down the road to ruin. Both however, are played with the sort of subdued nature required to sustain a prequel show like this for multiple seasons, and the development of both of those characters over time will be a key factor to the show’s success.

The writers do an excellent job mixing not only the mundane moments that are necessary at the start of the series to establish character, but also providing tension where it does pop up, whether it’s Norman’s discovery of his father’s death or the very intense rape/murder scene that occurs in the middle of the episode. In spite of that, the show makes it a priority to let these moments breathe, as it’s most truly unsettling parts come from Norma’s reaction to both situations (and some lesser ones such as Norman’s request to join the track team).

The soundtrack to this show also is pretty impressive, following the classic horror soundtrack that one would expect from a series built around one of horror’s most psychotic characters. Soft piano music plays through happier segments, while your standard horror strings move through the tense parts. The visuals are equally impressive, often relying a palette of beiges, and yellows to provide a quaint feeling.

The Final Verdict: Bates Motel is everything that a show like The Following wishes it could be. It’s creepy, it’s unsettling, and it’s most intense moments are frankly uncomfortable enough that it eschews the jump scares. It ultimately feels like one part Smallville, one part Twin Peaks, and one part any twisted family drama you can think of. Check it out, you won’t be disappointed.

Filed Under: BREAKING NEWS, ENTERTAINMENT, OPINION, REVIEWS, TELEVISION Tagged With: A+E, Bates Motel, Freddie Highmore, TV reviews, Vera Farmiga

RuPaul’s Drag Race Recap: So Take a Big Whiff

by David Baxter

rupauls-drag-race-season-5-guest-judges

Last time, Roxxxy pulled off her wig to reveal another wig and shantay, everyone stayed! What’s gonna happen this week? Roxxxy talks more about her life as an abandoned child. Alaska bemoans not having won a challenge. Coco’s ready for this. Bring it! Only, after the jump.

Shemail. Can you smell me? Don’t funk it up. Ru comes in and asks if all the gworls are homesick. So she invites the pit crew in. They keep coming. ..and coming . .  and coming. Lots of shirtless muscle boys. Andrew Christian comes in and I groan. Yay for body image warping underwear and a body dysmorphic culture! Anyway, they basically have to play “Memory” but with the guy’s underwear. Hot damn. There’s lots of dropped trou. Half the girls totally pause and get distracted. Anyway, we’re ALL winners, only Ivy Winters wins the phone call home, so she decides to call her mom.

The main challenge is to create and market the girls’ own fragrances. By the way, Jinkx is wearing some weird shawl. The dolls all run to the table and start grabbing as many fragrance oils as possible. Alaska decides that this is her challenge and that she wants something earthy and dirty. Jinkx is working on her perfume and Ivy comes over and they chat. Jinkx says that Ivy is the only gworl who gets her. There’s a lot of giggling and eye contact.

RuPaul joins the gworls and heads to Alaska and picks up her bottle of perfume and sniffs it like a bottle of poppers. HA! We move to Roxxxy whose fragrance is Thick and Juicy. The bottle is covered in rhinestones and fruit. Roxxxy says it smells like food and Ru says it smells like IHOP. We move to Coco who’s doing something that sounds like “Ruanimal” which doesn’t make any damn sense. Ru’s taken aback and leaves  it on that. Alyssa’s doing something called “Alyssa’s Secret” but doesn’t know what her secret is. Detox is over that crap and Ru says to clarify the message. Ivy’s doing a fragrance called “Poisoned Rosebud” and after talking to RuPaul, feels that the scent and campaign isn’t really about HER, and thus goes back to the drawing board.

We move on to the filming of the commercial, done by Michelle Visage and Aubrey O’Day. The queens are really excited about Aubrey, for some reason. Anyway, Jinkx starts out and Aubrey immediately goes into him for making it too slutty. Aubrey jumps up to lay out over the pit crew in some hideously ugly pants. Ivy comes out with a NYC backdrop, thinking to do a fast paced urban setting, only to be told that that’s Tokyo. Ooops. Doesn’t she live here? Anyway, Ivy keeps stumbling on the words and Aubrey’s not impressed. Coco joins us wearing all leopard print, and while it’s not that good, do you have to be so damn judgmental, Miss O’Day? What exactly have you done besides be the most famous Danity Kane member, which is kinda like saying the most famous Dream Street member? Then Coco lies on a fainting couch with Sean Morales in a lion mask, and I think “Ok, yeah, Aubrey has a point.” Detox is doing some pun on the word “heroin/heroine” which is funny, and then she does this thing where she uses this deep man voice to say “heroin/e” and it’s jarring, but … ok, it’s funny. Aubrey looks like someone peed in her Kool-Aid (which would explain why she’s not using it to dye her hair, anymore). Alyssa does her thing where she gets nervous and finds EVERYTHING funny, but still drops the ball in a million places. Roxxxy wears a giant yellow thing and looks like a huge raccoon peep (seriously, gworl, bend around yo’ eyes!). She has this smell thing that’s got potential but wasn’t worked out too well. Alaska comes in wearing her Lady Bunny wig and we find that she’s not just Red, as she told Ru, but Red … for Filth. HA. I love this. You need to do more away from RoLaskaTox. Michelle tells her to spin like Wonder Woman, and Aubrey’s impressed that Alaska took control and knew what she wanted.

Back in the holding cell, Alaska pulls out a photo book about her drag house and starts crying. I think he’s going to win. Ivy gets to call her mom, who looks a little bit like Christi from Dance Moms. Jinkx admits that’s he’s developing feelings for Ivy and Roxxxy and Alyssa listen in and give us DRAMA GWORL faces. Ivy comes back in and Jinkx does the “not sure when to stop this hug” thing.

Mainstage! Coco comes out in a zebra dress and looks like an optical illusion. Alaska is crazed business woman, in all red and black. Ivy’s got a cute lacy flouncy dress thing on, but its way way too tame. At the very least, it needs bigger hair. Detox is doing some mermaid dress that’s see through and is kind of tame for her. Alyssa’s wearing some couch print Dynasty/Dallas power dress suit. Jinkx is doing a cute lacey flapper girl. Roxxxy comes out in a very unflattering white cat suit, and looks like she’s a fanny pack away from being Fran Dresher’s mother.

Before each critique, we see the commercial. Coco, again, has lots of leopard print. Like on her, on her face on the background. The judges aren’t down with it and the lion head was just weird. Santino says she’s wearing too many accessories and everyone thinks the perfume smells horrible. Michelle feels there’s too much ass kissing. Aubrey thinks that Coco is way too unoriginal.

Alaska’s commercial is hilarious with just enough camp. You can hear Ru cackle in the background. Aubrey says that this is the only perfume she’d wear.

Ivy’s a little boring and there’s not much going on, EVEN when she does this fun little change with her dress that you don’t really see coming. The panel thinks she’s wearing an ice skating dress and isn’t impressed.

Detox’s Heroine was out there enough that the judges, generally, liked it. However, the look she brought was rather homemade and unfinished looking.

Alyssa’s didn’t stand out for anyone, except that she’s not that good a salesperson, mainly due to the fact that she doesn’t know what she’s selling. She also has Aubrey’s weird open scary eye thing.

Jinkx keeps whispering her mantra of “water off a duck’s back” and Ru finally catches it. I think it’s a bit. . . endearing but not entirely so, which makes sense to me. Her commercial is actually pretty funny and works well with the theme of Delusion. Michelle LOVES the look and I’m glad. Aubrey says it felt vaudeville, and I really wonder if that’s supposed to be a bad thing, knowing Jinkx.

Roxxxy comes out and there’s this whole reveal about her boobs. Her cat suit’s bow placement was weird and in general, Michelle and Aubrey felt she was unprofessional and the whole thing was just incredibly tacky, which is Roxxxy in a nutshell, for better or worse.

Michelle gives Jinkx another high five for growing and Alaska wins the challenge this week. Roxxxy looks incredibly pissed, but I say it’s her own damn fault. Ivy and Alyssa are the bottom two and have to lip synch to “Ain’t Nothin’ Going’ on but the Rent.” Ivy. . . stays where she is, which is a choice, but ends up being boring. Alyssa is all over the stage giving us Working Gworl Realness. Shantay, Alyssa stays, and Ivy sashays away. Jinkx looks devastated and feels that he’s lost the only person who gets him. Ivy says they’ll be seeing more of each other later.

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, TELEVISION Tagged With: rupauls drag race, snark, television recaps

Chatty Talk with Elise

by Elise Pentz

Julianne Hough

Well, this has been a sad weekend in celebrity news!  I’m sad to announce Julianne Hough & Ryan Seacrest have called it quits!  They had been dating for nearly 3 years & I thought they were really going to make it work & go the distance!!  So sad, let’s hope for a short break, before rekindling their love!!

Julianne Hough
Credit to: justjared.com

Lindsey Vonn & Tiger Woods have decided to finally go public with their not so well kept secret!  They may have been able to keep it a secret, had Lindsey not been seen boarding Tigers private jet!  Have to be super sneaky to keep anything secret around here guys!

Tiger Woods
Credit to: tigerwoods.com

Filed Under: BREAKING NEWS, ENTERTAINMENT, OPINION, uncategorized Tagged With: breakup, Hollywood Romance, Julianne Hough, Lindsey Vonn, Ryan Seacrest, Splitsville, Tiger Woods

Penelope Cruz, Miss America and Danny Devito!

by Elise Pentz

Miss America

Heyyyoooooooooo & welcome back!

A lot has been going on in the celebrity world!

 

Penelope Cruz
Credit to:Eonline.com

 

Lets begin with Penélope Cruz & Javier Bardem! As everyone knows, they are expecting their second child & judging by this picture, I’d say to expect that beautiful baby sometime early summer!  And don’t even get me started on how smokin’ hot she looks!  Pregnancy looks FANTASTIC on her!

Miss America
Credit to:People.com

Miss America Mallory Hytes Hagan was recently called overweight, when pictures of her hanging at the beach with friends were blasted all over the internet.. I’d like to say, whoever called her fat is out of their minds!! She looks fantastic & healthy.. Nothing fat about her! An she’s standing up for herself, saying on Anderson Cooper Live.. “I think that I’m human…and I’d like to equate getting ready for the Miss America pageant, you know, to getting ready for a boxing match, we get into shape and then afterwards life goes back to normal.” Good for you girl & you look great!

Danny DeVito
Credit to: People.com

More fabulous news!  Danny DeVito & Rhea Perlman have reconciled!! After a short separation  they have decided to make it work, & after 30 years of marriage, you have to be happy for them!

Filed Under: BREAKING NEWS, ENTERTAINMENT, TELEVISION, uncategorized Tagged With: Beach, Bikini, Danny DeVito, Javier Bardem, Mallory Hytes Hagan, Miss America, Penélope Cruz, Penelope Cruz baby, Rhea Perlman

New York City Street Photography- A Rainy Day in Manhattan

by Mark Giarrusso

Umbrellas on 5th.

The rain in Manhattan creates an unique atmosphere. The clouds close tight around the buildings and the gray skies seem to drain the color from the city. It generates an almost nostalgic feel as if New York has taken a step back in time. It’s like the whole world has become black and white and the city’s mood changes completely. Umbrellas go up and the people shuffle up and down the avenues. For a photographer, it’s too good to pass up.

Hallucinations on 6th
Hallucinations on 6th, 6th Ave., NYC, Photo by Mark Giarrusso, 2013
Ghosts of 5th Ave.
Ghosts of 5th Ave., 5th Ave., NYC, Photo by Mark Giarrusso, 2013
Rain on Madison Ave.
Rain on Madison Ave., Madison Ave., NYC, Photo by Mark Giarrusso, 2013
Getting a Taxi on 5th.
Getting a Taxi on 5th., 5th Ave., NYC, Photo by Mark Giarrusso, 2013
Rain on 5th Ave.
Rain on 5th Ave., 5th Ave., NYC, Photo by Mark Giarrusso, 2013
Man With Umbrella on Church Steps
Man With Umbrella on Church Steps, 5th Ave, NYC, Photo by Mark Giarrusso, 2013
Waiting to Cross
Waiting to Cross, 5th Ave., NYC, Photo by Mark Giarrusso, 2013
Umbrellas on 5th.
Umbrellas on 5th., 5th Ave., NYC, Photo by Mark Giarrusso, 2013

Filed Under: ARTS, BREAKING NEWS Tagged With: Photography Photo NewYorkCity BlackandWhite Art StreetPhotography MonochromePhotography BlackandWhitePhotography CandidPhotography PeoplePhotography NewYorkCity NewYorkPhotography RainPhotography Colo

Girls Season 2 Review

by Peter Foy

Girls_logo

In my mid-season review of Girls’ second season I said that it looked like this would both surpass the first, as well as change the minds of the show’s detractors. Well, I can’t say the latter prediction was accurate as people don’t just hate this show, they spit at it vehemently. If you were a fan of the first season, however, than you should find this a more fulfilling, more sincere, and more mature sophomore series, that shows no signs of tearing apart.

Girls is very much a show about a struggling generation, and this season only evolved on that theme. The first scene in the very first episode involved Dunham’s character Hannah frustrated over the prospects of her parents withdrawing their funds for her, and the show has continued to enlighten one of the uneasiness of living off one’s parents in a post-collegiate life. I’ve noticed that many people have found Hannah to be unlikable as they find her lazy and irresponsible in regards to the fact that she doesn’t hold a career. I feel that these same people have been neglecting to realize that this character is trying hard to make it as a writer, while also dealing with the pressures of her life. The last three episodes of the season do reveal that she has struggled with OCD in the past, and it’s return to her life has left her sickly to say the least. Speaking of sick, the show continued to wear it’s HBO logo with flying colors, with enough bizarre sex scenes to give Howard Stern a year’s worth of material. It’s become a hot media topic to report on how racy the show’s sexual content, but more and more it’s becoming apparent to me that the characters have awkward sex because they are so unstable, and uncertain about everything in their lives.

Yes, this was a bit of a darker season, with some of the more dramatic story arcs revolving around the character’s romantic and parental woes. Fortunately, Girls remained very much a comedy, and a quirky one too. The dialogue was snarky, and it’s observations on sex and prolonged adolescence were all funny because they were so honest. I remember back in the summer of 2007, when Judd Apatow had just released both Superbad and Knocked Up, I was hopeful that we were at the beginning of a new golden age for American comedic films. I felt we would see more films in the coming years that sublimely melded the high-brow subtext with the low-brow humor, and featured highly relatable characters in frequently hilarious (yet realistic) situations. Instead, I feel that Bridesmaids is the one American comedy since then to have really gotten it right, while plenty of others (I.E. Pineapple Express, Funny People, and yes even The Hangover) have paled in comparison. Girls however, really feels like what I want from a post-Apatow world, as it’s got enough heart to make it’s genetalia jokes resonate. Even with Apatow’s presence as an executive producer apparent, Lena Dunham still gives the show her distinct flavor, and proves to possibly be even more complex.

FE_PR_130111LenaDunhamGirls425x283

Perhaps most impressive about this season, however, is that there were plenty of episodes that showcased that Girls is a show that plays it realistic, yet at the same time knows when it’s okay to have character actions based more on story logic. This is what makes this season’s fifth episode, One Man’s Trash, the show’s best entry to date. This episode can be seen as a stand-alone episode but it’s so integral to the series’ ongoing theme. In it, Hannah decides to go to the house of a man (Patrick Wilson) who complained to her boss about their sanitation regulations, and apologize for what happened. The meeting turns into an affair for the two characters, with Dunham and Wilson both showing unexpected chemistry with one another. Many people I’ve talked to have felt that it is highly unrealistic that Wilson’s character (a much older man, who is also a successful doctor) would instantly go for sexual contact with Hannah, but even if that is the case it’s hard to fault the episode for it’s payoff. The episode has a plaful tone to it, until it climaxes with an emotional confession from Hannah. Performing in tears (and not the “hysterical” kind), Dunham nails it here, showing her protagonist at her most vulnerable, and sympathetic. The episode gives the viewers a look into how Hannah really feels about herself, and gives us more insight into what drives her. It’s an intimate moment from the show that really addresses what this show is doing so differently than any other “chick” show on the air right now.

One meticulously written article I came across (right here!) praised the show for incorporating psychological tactics into the storytelling, even saying it was the first TV show to be so psychologically rich since The Sopranos. At first this claim felt a bit like a stretch for me, but the more I thought about it I realized it was a very nifty comparison. Similar to how that show often had episodes conclude open-ended, leaving viewers to fill in the gaps based on their knowledge of the characters, Girls really uses this in great effect to reflecting the aura of discomfort that hovers over the contemporary 20-something zeitgeist. These characters are in a constant mind fluctuation about who they are, with characters saying one thing while purely expressing something completely different. Many episodes this season ended with the narrative not addressing how the characters went by with their conundrums (what happened to the dog Ray brought to Staten Island?),  which parallels the emotional limbo of it all.

Girls season two does indeed live up to the stellar reviews, and in many ways it surpassed my expectations. In just one season Lena Dunham has gone from an indie-film underdog, to an artistically heralded champ. An overnight sensation, for the art-school generation! With plenty of interesting character revelations made during the finale, there’s already so much potential for where the third season will go. Here’s hoping that the best has yet to come for Girls, the new hip spot on the pop-culture landscape.

GIRLSCAST

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, TELEVISION, uncategorized

NBC decides to return Sing-Off to airwaves

by Michael Tyminski

Season 3's Judges: (l to r.) Ben Folds, Sara Bareilles, and Shawn Stockman. (Source: NBC)
Season 3's Judges: (l to r.) Ben Folds, Sara Bareilles, and Shawn Stockman. (Source: NBC)
Season 3’s Judges: (l to r.) Ben Folds, Sara Bareilles, and Shawn Stockman. (Source: NBC)

In what has to be a stunning reversal of events, NBC’s other singing show The Sing-Off is finding its’ way back on to the airwaves in the fall of 2013.

The show’s return was announced via a casting call from show judge Ben Folds, who posted it via his Facebook earlier today. A new production team is supposed to be involved, as Entertainment Weekly notes that Mark Burnett Productions (who also does the Voice and has been a juggernaut in the reality genre for the past decade) is working to revamp season 4.

The show, which ran for three seasons between 2009 and 2011, was cancelled when NBC opted to double down on its’ hit competition franchise, The Voice for the 2012 season. It’s most notable winner was YouTube sensation Pentatonix, known for putting a futuristic spin on the a capella genre.

This is a stunning surprise in a year where networks are suddenly looking to bring back old favorites such as CW returning Whose Line is it Anyway? (without Drew Carey, but with many of the show’s original favorites).

I for one, enjoyed the original series, which encouraged creativity in arrangement and overall musical talent versus the never-ending audition process that plagues shows such as American Idol and The Voice. It should be interesting to see if they bring back the full panel (i’m going to go out on a limb and say that Folds is involved seeing how he publicized the casting call).

Filed Under: BREAKING NEWS, ENTERTAINMENT, TELEVISION Tagged With: Ben Folds, NBC, News, Pentatonix, The Sing Off, TV Returns

Dance Moms Recap: Full Metal Tutu

by David Baxter

abbyleemillerdance80371Dance Moms! This week starts two weeks of two hour episodes! It’s so much, I might explode! Last week there was speed dating and some group number that didn’t make any sense! Jill was sneaky! More after the jump. [Read more…] about Dance Moms Recap: Full Metal Tutu

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, TELEVISION Tagged With: dance moms, dance moms recap, snark, television recaps

Album Review: Autechre – Exai

by Rio Toro

Album Cover

Album Cover

Autechre:          Exai

Similar Artists:          Aphex Twin

Genre:          IDM

Label:          Warp

 

Can “unpredictable” still be used as a term to describe Autechre? After all, for 20 years they have churned out album after album of nightmarishly difficult IDM while maintaining a similar aesthetic. To be truly unpredictable, Autechre would have to make a pop album with traditional verse chorus verse song structure. Of course, that is not the case here, as Exai, the duo’s 11th album, continues to break all of the rules and then some. This is music that adheres to no principles or formalities, and the lack of grounding can often seem like what you are listening to isn’t music at all. Although us fans have become somewhat used to Autechre’s blend of broken, seemingly haphazard metal machine music, it remains shocking and exhilarated for the fact that only a handful of other producers can make music this complex.

This will most likely be the most difficult album I will ever attempt to review. Sean Booth and Rob Brown have gotten progressively harsher and more disorienting as the years have gone by; this enormous quadruple LP is a continuation of their claim to fame and raises the stakes yet another bar. The album’s length is truly menacing when one is considering the music we are dealing with. While lengthy albums/EPs were always the name of the game for this group, this is by far their longest. What makes this length tolerable (and what many critics seem to not understand) is that you are not required to listen to all of it in one sitting. No one is asking you to digest these tracks on the first go around, and the reason is because it’s impossible. You are going to have to devote a lot of time with this behemoth to really sink your teeth in, and I certainly hope that you do, because what it contains is excellent.

Enjoyment from this album will be based on if you are willing to listen repeatedly for at least a few days (more if you are new to this group). On the first track, “Fleure” we are immediately dropped into the unrelenting storm of non-repeating patterns and unfollowable structure that represents the band at their most volatile. Although this is one of the shortest tracks on the album, it is representative of the 16 yet to come. A complaint here would be that the track sequencing doesn’t allow for many breaks. There are no ambient interludes in play to calm our nerves or help us readjust. Exai is raw, and often sounds as if it’s being played live. So a recommendation for your own safety: if your brain can’t handle anymore ricochet percussion and stabbing collisions of metal then you should probably take a break.

While my favorite way to describe this duo is “a fucked version of 90’s UK elektro”, Autechre have proved they can make music that is entirely mechanical and inhuman, yet somehow melancholic and evocative. Some might say that Autechre did a better job of harnessing this balance on their earlier work, (I would have to agree with this) but the best of these tracks still hover around the line of tranquility and disgust. Playing games with our senses is what many of the best electronic producers are capable of, and it is why Autechre’s music often sounds fresh after years of listening to it. Although this is a new album, I believe these tracks will prove to have similar longevity. It is not hard to see that these two are working at the top of their game.

So despite what some might claim, these tracks do have feeling attached to them. The emotion is certainly buried under broken, erratically placed keyboards and schizophrenic drum programming, but the best of these tracks represent coalescence between man and machine. Possibly more than anyone else, Booth and Rob Brown’s create music that suggests they are one with the machines they are working with.

Pretentious is a term thrown at these guys quite a bit, but Autechre are not in this business in an attempt to create the most bastardized and incomprehensible music of their time. Even at Exai’s most chaotic, everything from the jackhammer bass to the nefarious drones and pulsating collisions of high-end effects loops are purposeful. While previous albums, such as the heavily disputed “Confield”, have incorporated randomly programmed generators, the musicians are in complete control of the music experience this time around.

I will end this review by mentioning that I crashed my car while listening to this album. Surprisingly, when speaking of something this abrasive, the accident occurred because I fell asleep at the wheel. While this isn’t the kind of music that would be able to lull most to sleep, in the exhausted state of mind I was in, I couldn’t resist the transportative qualities the current track was suggesting. Eventually, fighting against my dream state was not an option. Thankfully, no one was hurt, but the experience made me think about the power that music has over us. If it can convince me that entering a dream state is more important than driving, than this stuff should come with a warning label.

 

Track Listing:

1.)

FLeure

2.)

irlite (get 0)

3.)

prac-f

4.)

jatevee C

5.)

T ess xi

6.)

vekoS

7.)

Flep

8.)

tuinorizn

9.)

bladelores

10.)

1 1 is

11.)

nodezsh

12.)

runrepik

13.)

spl9

14.)

cloudline

15.)

deco Loc

16.)

recks on

17.)

YJY UX

Filed Under: BREAKING NEWS, ENTERTAINMENT, MUSIC, REVIEWS Tagged With: Album Review, Autechre, exai, music

Family Trade is a Bad Bargain

by Michael Tyminski

Gardner Stone of Family Trade by his G-Stone Motors sign (Source: GSN)
Gardner Stone of Family Trade by his G-Stone Motors sign (Source: GSN)
Gardner Stone of Family Trade by his G-Stone Motors sign (Source: GSN)

Family Trade: Tuesdays 8 pm, GSN

Am I the only one who remembers when GSN only showed game shows? Probably, but in the last half decade or so they’ve expanded their reach, whether it’s trying to capitalize on the poker boom in the mid-00’s (High Stakes Poker, and World Series of Blackjack), competition shows (reruns of Dancing with the Stars), and whatever you would call Kenny vs. Spenny.

Their biggest stretch from the original format of the network has been their new found obsession of grafting “reality” programming into their scheduling. Tonight marks the debut of GSN’s newest offering to the genre: Family Trade. Family Trade depicts the life of a family whom owns an automobile dealership in Vermont. The key twist, however, is family patriarch Gardner Stone’s guarantee that he will accept anything in trade that he thinks he can sell in exchange for a BRAND NEW CAR! (Sorry, I just couldn’t resist the urge there.) His children, Todd and Darcy, question this strategy at every turn while having the difficult task of moving the objects that their father just bartered away a car for.

So how does this mash-up of Let’s Make a Deal and Pawn Stars fare? Well for starters, the stakes don’t seem that high. In both instances, the barters only covered a portion of the down payment, which takes all of the stakes out of the game (one barter for Maple Syrup involved $2,500 in Maple Syrup, however the cost of the truck in question was over $50,000). Furthermore, there seems to be an absolute minimum of substantial conflict as Gardner always wins these disputes (one employee flat out states it).

The show was also advertised as having a focus on family drama, yet Family Trade comes out lacking there as well. In the first two episodes, there was a dearth of conflict or even raised voices. This becomes particularly glaring as the show relies on filler shots, a tension chord, and straddling deals over commercial breaks to create a seemingly false sense of tension.

This lack of drama would suffice if there were other reasons to emotionally invest in the Stone family. Unfortunately, Family Trade limits each of it’s primary characters to a cardboard cut out. We only learn about Gardner that’s he bull headed and he’ll trade for and with anything as long as he comes out ahead. Similarly we learn that Todd is skeptical of the barter business and that he thinks Gardner is nuts for taking the deals he has but that’s it. Darcy and Travis, the two other employees of G-Stone motors who get remotely regular screen time tend to come off as faceless entities.

When the focus changes to Todd and Darcy dealing with the ramifications of Gardner’s decisions, the show gets considerably more interesting. This is particularly notable when Gardner and Darcy can’t bring themselves to sell the pigs they bought from a customer looking for a trailer at a farmer’s auction. Darcy’s imploring Gardner to find a more humane end for the pigs while Todd is bewildered at why they took the trade to begin with. Similarly, when Gardner sells maple syrup in barter to win a selling contest for the leftover maple syrup with Todd, the two squabble because Gardner made a “profit” in credit from the restaurants while Todd took a loss but picked up actual cash.

The Final Verdict: Family Trade is incredibly bland. Whereas many shows in the reality genre focus on hair-pulling or seemingly life and death choices, Trade is hyped to be a big deal but ultimately focuses on life’s little problems and a quirky dealership. The show probably would have worked better if they spent less time trying to punch it up in the drama department and instead focused on taking a more slice of life perspective and divulging a little more on its’ key stars than the two dimensional caricatures we get. Skip it, Tuesday’s one of the stronger nights on the dial and once you’ve seen one episode you’ll feel like you’ve seen all of them.

Filed Under: BREAKING NEWS, ENTERTAINMENT, OPINION, REVIEWS, TELEVISION Tagged With: Family Trade, GSN, TV reviews

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