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Tim Morris

Guild Wars 2 Feature Pack – Part 3

by Tim Morris

Copyright ArenaNet Source: guildwars2.com
Copyright ArenaNet
Source: guildwars2.com

Guild Wars 2 goes “mega.”

Welcome back! This is the third and final part of our coverage of the Guild Wars 2 Feature Pack, which goes live on the 15th! We’ve covered balance updates, PvP, quality of life upgrades, the new wardrobe feature, and new traits, but this part of the patch figures to be bigger than them all! Responding to the game-wide issue of certain zones and cities being barren and unpopulated, ArenaNet has seen fit to completely overhaul the way servers operate, giving birth to the “Megaserver System.”

How will it work? Well, for starters, it won’t be going entirely into effect on the 15th. It will be a deliberate process, beginning with the Heart of the Mists PvP hub and the maps with the lowest populations, and should be complete by the end of the year. The Megaserver System seeks to provide players with well-populated zones around the clock, that way there’s always someone to play with and the less populated events in the game get done more often. Instead of each server having one main copy of a given map, the Megaserver System will combine all worlds together and only have the number of copies it needs to accommodate the player population in a given map. It will also allow for players who are in the same party or guild to play together more easily, with functions dedicated to ensuring that related players are placed in the same instance of a map or can easily join friends if they’re separated.

But wait! World bosses spawn at different times on each server! How will they be affected? Fear not, players. With the rollout of the Megaserver Systems comes a standardized schedule for the various world bosses, which you can find here. Bosses that previously did not have failure mechanics or timers will be getting them, to ensure that the game remains on schedule. Also, many of the bosses will be tweaked to preserve balance, and this includes abilities, overall difficulty, or even the event chains that lead up to their encounters. Such changes were not detailed in the reveal, but will be available in the release notes next week.

Waypoints, dungeons, and temples will be slightly affected by the new changes as well. For instance, you will no longer be able to tell if a waypoint is actually uncontested until you arrive on the map that it’s in. In the Orr maps, which have many contested waypoints, this figures to be a bit of a hassle. The same goes for the three dungeons that require event chain completion to open: Citadel of Flame, Crucible of Eternity, and The Ruined City of Arah. You will now have to waypoint to Fireheart Rise, Mount Maelstrom, or Cursed Shore, respectively, to find out the status of these dungeons. As for temples, the god statues that normally have cross-map mechanics will no longer function that way, and instead will only be active when the nearest temple becomes contested.

The final aspects of the Megaserver System covered were guilds and World vs. World. Guilds will remain separate for now; they will still be server-specific until the Megaserver System is completely implemented, but once that happens guild members will earn influence towards the same total regardless of their home world. Guilds will still have a hard cap of 500 members and if a guild has chapters on multiple servers, they cannot be combined. World vs. World will remain unchanged for the time being and logically speaking, it’s unlikely to be affected by the Megaserver System at all. ArenaNet is making many ambitious changes here, so it’s nice to see that they’re preserving the identity of Guild Wars 2‘s WvW game mode for the sake of those who have made their legend on the battlefield.

With all of these imminent changes coming to Guild Wars 2, the game will never be the same again! I’m admittedly skeptical about a few things that ArenaNet is trying with this patch, but I’m also greatly excited that a number of issues that have existed since launch are finally getting the proper attention they need. If you’ve never played Guild Wars 2, now would be a great time to jump in; it really is a fantastic MMO during its high points (and it’s on sale for $24.99 until Saturday). They may not get everything right, but I have a strong feeling that ArenaNet knocked this out of the park.

For more information regarding the Guild Wars 2 Feature Pack, click here. For more of our coverage on the Guild Wars 2 Feature Pack, click here (Part 1) and here (Part 2).

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, TECHNOLOGY Tagged With: april 15th, arenanet, feature pack, guild wars 2, Mac, MMO, PC, rpg, video games

Top 5 Easter Eggs in Games- Manhattan Digest

by Tim Morris

The best goodies in the basket.

In honor of Easter Weekend, I decided it would be a good idea to compile a short list of my favorite Easter Eggs in video games. Easter Eggs are fun secrets that exist in various games, normally accessed without the use of cheat codes or hacking software. Oftentimes they’re interesting or humorous things that developers want gamers to search for and over the years they’ve truly helped games have more staying power. Here they are, my top five Easter Eggs in games:

5. Half-Life – Made by Valve, Half-Life‘s console has allowed gamers and modders alike to adjust the experience however they see fit. By loading up the “c1a1c” map and activating “-noclip” mode, the player can gain access to areas outside the map. One of these is a black box that is covered with the mug of Valve founder Gabe Newell on the inside. I’m talking a thousand copies of this man’s face.

Copyright Valve Source: YouTube
Copyright Valve
Source: YouTube

4. Grand Theft Auto IV – Ever wondered what the heart of Liberty City looks like? Well, it… it looks like a heart. Don’t believe me? If you fly a helicopter to the Statue of Happiness, there’s a set of doors that says, “No hidden content this way.” Go through it, and you’ll find a giant heart bound by chains. If this is some kind of social commentary, I’d love to know more about it.

Copyright Rockstar Source: Smosh
Copyright Rockstar
Source: Smosh

3. Chrono Trigger – Sometimes, if you try really hard and do your best in a video game, you get to meet the developers. Well, not really, but there is a hidden developer room in Chrono Trigger. To access it, clear the game once and start a New Game+. Once you do that, a gate will appear at the start. Take it to do battle with a super-powered Lavos, and should you emerge victorious you’ll encounter the developers (in-character) at the End of Time.

Copyright Square Enix Source: Let's Play Archive
Copyright Square Enix
Source: Let’s Play Archive

2. Halo: Combat Evolved – Never ones to shy away from having fun with their player base, Bungie always had fun gags to show players who completed the Halo games on the hardest difficulty setting. In the first entry, the extended ending shows Sgt. Johnson batting an Elite for his assault rifle. However, the scene takes an unexpected yet hilarious turn once the Pillar of Autumn’s self-destruct sequence gets activated. You need to see it to believe it.

1. Mortal Kombat – The game that practically invented the ESRB rating system tops my list. Sometimes before a match, a green ninja appears and drops hints on how to encounter him. This ninja’s name is Reptile, and he was the biggest secret in the game. To battle him, you had to wait for The Pit stage to appear in single-player and hope that a silhouette flies past the moon. Once those conditions are met, you must get a Double Flawless and finish your opponent with a fatality in the second round. Then, and only then, do you get to fight Reptile. This is also the only way of fighting on the bottom of the pit, which is covered in spikes and made a return in Mortal Kombat Trilogy years later. Click here to see the method in action.

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, OPINION, REVIEWS, TECHNOLOGY Tagged With: chrono trigger, easter eggs, gta 4, half-life, halo, lists, mortal kombat, top five, video games

Guild Wars 2 Feature Pack – Part 2- The Review

by Tim Morris

Copyright ArenaNet Source: guildwars2.com
Copyright ArenaNet
Source: guildwars2.com

You’re gonna like the way you look. I guarantee it.

Welcome to Part 2 of our coverage of the Guild Wars 2 feature patch! After last week’s reveals focused on game balance, traits, and gear upgrades, this new round of changes are mostly cosmetic. Not to the official site, of course, but revolving around dyes, the new wardrobe feature, new ways to earn gear, and general quality-of-life improvements. If you’re a guild leader, there are some improvements headed your way too!

We’re going to start things off this week with the new wardrobe feature, which was arguably the most demanded part of the feature patch. You can click here to watch a short video explaining some of the functions. Whenever you gain a weapon or piece of armor in-game, whether through drop, trading post, cash shop, or vendor – you permanently unlock the skin for that item as well. If you’d like to swap skins, you can do so from a new panel on your equipment screen. Doing so costs transmutation charges, which is a re-work of the current stone/crystal system already in place. Those items will be disappearing and players will receive one charge for every crystal in their inventory, and another charge for every three stones they possess. In a sense, it’s a similar system to the already-present Gear Locker in PvP, but it’ll now be game-wide. As a result, all of the PvP gear you’ve unlocked will also be a part of this system, so you may now apply those skins to your PvE/WvW gear as well. This feature will keep collectors busy for a long time to come!

Another heavily demanded change that ArenaNet is delivering is an overhaul of the dye system. Instead of being soulbound (per character), dyes will now be account bound, which means that all characters you’ve made can choose from the same pool of dyes that you’ve unlocked. In addition, if you have the same dye available on multiple characters, you’ll receive a free unidentified dye for each unique color you’ve consumed twice or more. To balance this, dyes will no longer be on the loot tables, and instead only available through the Mystic Forge, crafting (specifically the cooking profession), laurel merchants, and other special rewards. As a further bit of balance, the legendary staff known as The Bifrost, which currently requires 250 unidentified dyes as an ingredient, will now only need 100 unidentified dyes to craft the Gift of Color used to make it. Other changes to the system include making previewing colors easier and more streamlined confirmation of changes.

The next reveal involved the quality-of-life changes for guilds, and even though I’m currently a one-man guild I appreciate ArenaNet’s efforts here. Not being able to see the last time a guild member logged in was inexcusable, and that will be rectified when the feature patch hits on April 15th. The LFG (looking for group) system will also be getting some new bells and whistles, allowing players to group up for not only open world content, dungeons, and Fractals of the Mists, but after the feature patch hits, World vs. World will also become available. There will even be separate channels in the tool for each map, including all three borderlands, Eternal Battlegrounds, and Edge of the Mists! The LFG tool will also include specifications for language, as many of the European servers are multi-lingual. Throw in some backend support for guild members themselves, and Guild Wars 2‘s social abilities figure to be better than ever.

In what is sure to be welcome news for the battle-hardened folk who frequent WvW, world experience will now be account bound instead of soulbound. Points can still be spent differently on your various characters, so you won’t get stuck with the same bonuses across your entire account. This will allow players to change styles of play simply by switching characters, as you can be a supply master on one and a catapult master on another, for example. This reveal also came with news that any legendary or ascended gear possessed by one character will become account bound as well. So if you like, you can craft an ascended dagger and simply move it between characters using the bank as you see fit! You’re still restricted by the weapons and armor that potential recipients can equip, so don’t think you can make a spiffy piece of plate armor for your mesmer, for instance.

Speaking of armor, repairing your damaged or broken armor will now be free of charge! ArenaNet felt that the damage from dying is punishment enough and is removing repair fees from the game. The NPCs will still exist and I assume you can still sell items to them if you choose. While we’re on the subject of free things, players who like to experiment with builds will be glad to know that the new instant trait refund system I talked about last week will also be free! Simply click and tinker away, mad scientists!

The final reveal from this week is one that I’m sure will get many people interested in PvP. Reward Tracks are being introduced, and they’re a secondary achievement system of sorts, except that instead of rewarding points towards milestone chests, they reward items, armor, and weapons! Every major region of Tyria will be featured in these Reward Tracks, so players who like to stick to PvP can get drops that would normally come through PvE play by accomplishing given objectives. Dungeon-specific armor and weapons will also be made available through this feature on a rotating basis, or players can complete the story modes of the eight dungeons to allow them to complete the tracks at their leisure. In addition, future Living World and holiday events will be added as they are released. While I’d love for this system to be added on the PvE side too, PvPers have been getting the short end of the stick in this regard ever since release. They deserve the bone they’ve been thrown. To go along with this update, PvE/WvW gear will now carry over to the PvP side, as it previously did not.

In next week’s reveals, ArenaNet will be talking about “facilitating friendly play” in Guild Wars 2, as it currently says on the official site. Check back here for the latest news about the upcoming feature pack!

For Part 1 of our coverage, click here. For more information regarding the April 15th feature pack, click here.

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, TECHNOLOGY Tagged With: april 15th, feature pack, guild wars 2, Mac, mmorpg, patch, PC, pvp, updates, video games, WvW

Guild Wars 2 Feature Pack – Part 1

by Tim Morris

Copyright ArenaNet Source: guildwars2.com
Copyright ArenaNet
Source: guildwars2.com

Time to change the game.

With the first season of Guild Wars 2‘s Living Story wrapping up, developer ArenaNet has begun wheeling out its “feature patch”, which will drop on April 15th. They are releasing information about the patch in bite-sized portions over three weeks. Thus far, three pieces of the patch have been revealed and I will be covering those in this article, which will be the first of three outlining the new content.

Traits are what define builds in Guild Wars 2. Fresh Air for elementalists, Altruistic Healing for guardians, Prismatic Understanding for mesmers, etc. You don’t invest fully into a trait line for the stat boosts, since you can easily make up those points in your armor and trinkets; you invest for the traits themselves. ArenaNet has decided to simplify this system, as well as offer alternatives to obtain traits that will surely please players who enjoy exploration and a bit more challenge. Instead of having 70 points to distribute when your character hits level 80, you’ll have 14. To balance this, each point will equate to +50 of the associated stat boost, instead of the previous +10. As an example of what this means for spreading points, I’ll use my elementalist build. Right now I run 30/30/x/10/x, and once the patch releases it will be 6/6/x/2/x. In addition to this, the progression is also changing. In the current system, players can earn their first major trait at level 20. After the patch, new players (existing ones will be grandfathered in all aspects of the trait updates) cannot earn that same slot until level 36.

Perhaps the biggest piece of the change to traits comes in the form of trait guides. As homage to the first Guild Wars, players can choose to go adventuring and earn their traits by completing in-game tasks, or they can buy them from the profession trainer NPCs. All characters, new and old, will have to use one of these methods to unlock their new Grandmaster-tier traits (five for each class, one for each trait line). The final piece of the trait revamp is related to quality of life aspects, such as the ability to instantly refund all trait points (now free of charge) as well as the ability to move points around by clicking a newly-added minus button. These changes are being touted as a way to make experimentation easier and more streamlined, but it definitely throws a wrench into the thinking of people who use a specific gearset. Celestial armor carries equal boosts to all attributes instead of one major and two minor upgrades like all the other armor sets. With trait points being reduced from 70 to 14, there is no longer a way to evenly split them across all 5 lines, and so it throws that balance off.

Balancing the game has often been a trial for ArenaNet, as the community is often divided (and quite frankly, uninformed or biased) regarding what classes need help and which ones should get hit with the nerf gun. Through tinkering with runes and sigils while also addressing class balance with the new traits and other small adjustments, they hope to achieve a better meta across all game modes. The first major change here is that two-handed weapons will now have two sigil slots, something that was sorely needed. You won’t be able to equip two identical sigils, two different “stack on-kill” sigils, or utilize the old trick of getting 25 stacks of a boost and then unequipping said weapon, but overall the change is for the better. ArenaNet is also removing some of the hidden rules regarding sigils, and now each of those that have triggering effects will have their own cooldowns.

Runes are also receiving a long look in this feature patch. ArenaNet wants players to invest in complete rune sets as opposed to mixing and matching, and so they are making it more worthwhile to equip five or six of the same rune as opposed to two or three. For example, the Superior Rune of the Eagle has the following bonuses, in increasing number of runes equipped: +25 precision, +3% critical damage, +50 precision, +5% critical damage, +90 precision, and finally +5% damage to targets with less than 50% health. Here’s the new spread:

Copyright ArenaNet Source: guildwars2.com
Copyright ArenaNet
Source: guildwars2.com

For those wondering, ferocity is the new stat that affects critical damage (more on that later). The extra 10 precision and 1% damage to weakened foes may seem like a small boost, but as someone who runs offensive gear on all of my characters, every little bit helps. Also receiving buffs are runes that have a sixth bonus where something triggers at a given rate when a condition is met. For instance, the Superior Rune of the Nightmare currently has a 5% chance to inflict fear on an enemy who hits you. For this and all other runes with this type of bonus, the rate at which the effect happens is being increased to a whopping 50%. I could see this becoming an issue in PvP, but looking at it from a PvE standpoint I think it’s a welcome change.

The final major reveal so far is the change being made to critical damage and it is the one that I have a problem with. Critical hits carry a base 50% damage increase, and then whatever the character’s critical damage bonus is gets added onto that figure. On my main toon, who wears the best gear in the game, I have a 109% critical damage bonus. Due to the existence of active defenses in-game as well as how apt bosses are to deliver attacks that down players with a single blow regardless of , going with a fully offensive setup has always been the most optimal for PvE gameplay. Oftentimes this has led to arguments both in-game and on the forums between players who run optimal setups and players who continuously say “I play how I want” as their excuse for using everything else. These players, whether they know it or not, only make it harder for the offensively-geared to survive because enemies don’t die as quickly when they’re around.

There are a number of ways to fix the problem of Guild Wars 2 being too reliant on DPS (damage per second) as opposed to a balance of damage, support, and control, as was originally intended. Making enemy AI smarter, as in having them behave more like a human player, would’ve been the best way. Having mobs attack more times for fewer damage per strike would certainly help to reward defensive and healing setups while also allowing the big damage dealers to feel like they can eat an attack or two and save their dodges for bigger threats. Another idea I’ve seen tossed around called for making both the amount of endurance used per dodge and its associated recharge rate different across the eight classes, which would be a decent stopgap change. I’ve also read proposals that would simply buff healing and toughness to make them more worthwhile.

What did ArenaNet decide to do? Nerf the best players in the game. The switch from the easily understood critical damage % stat to the new ferocity has been said to be about a 10% drop in overall damage for the most offensive specs, but theorycrafting on the official forums and on Reddit has determined that the figure will probably be higher, with some saying it could reach 30%. Given the fact that certain classes can produce completely silly amounts of damage given the right circumstances, I could see how addressing this would make the list of potential adjustments. However, it’s by far the laziest option that ArenaNet had and it’s ill-advised when there are more pressing issues with the current metagame.

According to the reveal schedule for the feature patch, it seems as though next week’s information will be of the “quality of life” variety. Check back with us in a week’s time and stay in the loop!

If you’d like more information about the individual features discussed here, click on this link.

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, TECHNOLOGY Tagged With: exploration, feature patch, ferocity, guild wars 2, MMO, mmorpg, pve, pvp, rpg, rune, sigil, traits, updates

Japan Names Mascot for 2014 World Cup

by Tim Morris

Japan is channeling the Pika-power.

What’s cuter than Pokemon? Dressing the lovable monsters up in soccer uniforms and having them represent your country as its mascots. Never one to shy away from shameless cuteness, Japan has named Pikachu as its national soccer team’s mascot for the upcoming World Cup in Brazil. Pikachu won’t be going alone, though; it seems that he’ll also be bringing along some of his friends to join in on the fun (from Pikachu, clockwise: Squirtle, Litleo, Helioptile, Charmander, Fennekin, Meowth, Froakie, Pancham, Bulbasaur, and Chespin). Clearly the Japanese are capitalizing on their hottest commodity right now, even more so than the famous Mario.

However, I can’t help feeling like they’ve dropped the ball in a couple of instances here. First, it’s obvious that the choices shown in the above picture are meant to plug the most recent releases, X and Y. Of the eleven selections, six of them are those who made their debut in the newest generation of games. Oddly enough, the other five were part of the original 151. While it’s great for Nintendo that this is a sales-driven approach, I would’ve liked to see Jigglypuff (because it’s one of the most iconic Pokemon) and Voltorb (because it’s a ball) used instead of, say, Meowth and Helioptile… and yes, I realize how ridiculous I sound nitpicking this.

This is going to sound like wishful thinking here, but I could potentially see this springboarding the franchise into some sports titles down the road. Who wouldn’t want to play a Pokemon-based soccer video game? Or basketball? Or perhaps even football? I’d buy any of those games in a heartbeat with no regrets whatsoever. Whatever happens in the future of the series, this latest endeavor is sure to be memorable and I salute Japan for doing it.

Filed Under: BREAKING NEWS, ENTERTAINMENT, TECHNOLOGY, WORLD Tagged With: japan, mascot, pokemon, soccer, world cup

South Park: The Stick of Truth Review

by Tim Morris

Copyright Viacom Source: South Park Studios
Copyright Viacom
Source: South Park Studios

Being the new kid never felt so good.

I was just ten years old when South Park made its debut on Comedy Central. It’s crazy to think about sitting in my fifth-grade class while all my friends talked about the show, and I couldn’t join in because I wasn’t allowed to watch it. After 17 brilliant seasons, a movie, and a myriad of merchandise, the one thing that always felt missing from the behemoth of a franchise was a truly good video game. After some ill-fated titles that came three generations ago, such as South Park Rally and Chef’s Luv Shack, demand for another game entry was understandably low. However, after creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker approached Obsidian Entertainment to develop a game for them, South Park: The Stick of Truth was born. The fact that this game even made it to release is nothing short of remarkable, what with nearly two years of delays and a publisher change that occurred when THQ went bankrupt. However, unlike many cases of a game being delayed, The Stick of Truth was very much worth the wait.

The simplest way to explain this game is that it’s Paper Mario with a South Park coat of paint and more bells and whistles. You start by creating your own character, including hairstyle, facial features, and clothes. The customization really has some depth to it, so it’s worth playing around for a while to capture the perfect look that you want. You also get to choose from one of four character classes: Fighter, Mage, Thief, and Jew. The classes have different special abilities that you can upgrade in multiple ways, but it seemed like any class could equip any weapon and armor, so you aren’t getting useless drops during gameplay. The combat is surprisingly deep, complete with quick time events to either improve your damage or lower that of your enemies. You can bring one of six “buddies” into combat with you: Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Cartman, Butters, or Jimmy, and each are complete with their own abilities and weapons.

One of the things that you don’t truly realize just from watching the show is that the quiet mountain town of South Park isn’t really that small. There are many shops to visit that have all made appearances on the show, and in addition you can visit many of the kids’ houses and interact with their families too. Visiting all the places around town is imperative for building your quest log, and you’ll find that many of the citizens in-game need your help. Examples of quests include finding Jesus, recovering a lost iPad, and even placing ManBearPig sensors around town for Al Gore. While many of these are side quests and don’t progress the main story, the references and humor involved are more than reason enough to get them done. In addition, the game continues the tradition of the show by pushing the envelope as far as it can go. There are scenes depicting your character’s parents doing the nasty, large amounts of uncensored profanity, and even a battle with a gigantic Nazi zombie aborted fetus.

However, at its heart this game is an RPG and I shall judge it as such. To that end, South Park: The Stick of Truth has done very well for itself as a turn-based game in a world of real-time RPGs. It borrows elements from various games and yet still manages to create its own identity with the combination of the upgrade (through leveling) and perk (through gaining Facebook friends) systems. Menus are user-friendly and most situations where players get stumped are answered by your buddy if you wait long enough. I have only two complaints with the game, one major and one minor. The more serious gripe that I have is that the main storyline is far too short. I completed that part of the game in under nine hours. While there’s plenty to do on the side and postgame, I would’ve liked to see some more time invested in the overarching plot. The other, smallish complaint is that the game is very easy on the “Normal” difficulty setting. I was never really in danger of losing a fight from beginning to end.

Overall, South Park: The Stick of Truth is one of those games that you might not fully appreciate if you don’t love the source material, but if you do, prepare yourself for the most fun experience so far in 2014.

Final Grade: A-

Platform: Playstation 3, Xbox 360
Genre: RPG
Players: 1
Price: $59.99

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, OPINION, REVIEWS, TECHNOLOGY, TELEVISION

Top 10 – South Park Episodes

by Tim Morris

Getting you primed for The Stick of Truth.

Copyright Viacom Source: South Park Studios
Copyright Viacom
Source: South Park Studios

This coming Tuesday marks the release of the long-awaited game, South Park: The Stick of Truth. The anticipated RPG promises deep gameplay with the wild humor that South Park brings on a weekly basis, and I feel it best to honor the series’ storied success with my personal Top 10 favorite episodes, in advance of the game’s release:

10. “Royal Pudding” – If tradition is more your speed, then saddle up for some wacky Canadian customs. Some examples, you ask? Well, how about ripping off your bride’s arm and then shoving it up your ass? Covering your arms in butterscotch pudding, then having the bride scrape it off and spread it on her face? There actually is a story to be had, too, and that is the rescue of the Canadian princess from the evil Tooth Decay by Ike.

9. “Crème Fraiche” – Ever wish for a sex hotline for foodies? This episodes brings such a desire to life. After becoming addicted to and seemingly sexually aroused by the Food Network, Randy pursues cooking while Sharon discovers the Shake Weight when she believes that she is no longer attractive to Randy. While she’s working out, he’s appearing on challenge shows after taking over the school cafeteria. Eventually, Sharon realizes the true purpose of the Shake Weight, which is what we’re all thinking every time one of the commercials airs: handjobs.

8. “Super Fun Time” – Go back to 1864 in this “super fun” episode where a class trip to Pioneer Village turns ugly real fast. A group of armed men who had just robbed a Burger King show up and take everyone hostage. Meanwhile, Butters and Cartman had ditched the trip (Cartman wanted out and Butters is his buddy for the field trip, so he’s forced to go along) to hit up Super Phun Tyme, a nearby arcade. Since the people of Pioneer Village can’t break character, the hostage situation only gets worse in the most hilarious ways possible. Eventually, Stan plays this to his advantage and saves the day.

7. “Fishsticks” – A rather benign joke from Jimmy turns into a crisis when Kanye West believes he’s been called a gay fish (sources say that this might actually be true) and as he’s done with most of his career, Carlos Mencia claims credit for the comedic sensation. Meanwhile, Cartman spends most of the episode convincing himself that he was the one who came up with the joke, and that Jimmy stole it from him. Finally, Kanye comes to terms with being a gay fish, and swims happily among his own kind.

6. “Cripple Fight” – Jimmy and Timmy throw down in what I consider to be the greatest fight in South Park history. Here is the iconic fight in all its glory for your viewing pleasure. I need not make a further case for this episode’s inclusion on the list.

5. “The Return of the Fellowship of the Ring to the Two Towers” – What do you get when you cross Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and a misplaced video that happens to be the most vile and disgusting porno ever? A completely traumatic and golden episode that ranks with the series’ best. In this instant classic, the boys embark on a mission to return the porno to the local video store while Butters takes on the role of Gollum in search of the tape, predictably referred to as his “Precious”. After successfully returning the tape, battling both Butters and a bunch of 6th graders, the boys receive a lecture from their parents about some of the less traditional aspects of sex. Problem is, the only one who actually saw the tape was Token.

4. “Imaginationland” – I’m grouping all three parts as one episode here because they truly capture the essence of the show as a whole rather than separate parts. The saga begins with another argument/bet between Kyle and Cartman. Cartman believes that leprechauns are real, and naturally Kyle does not. If Cartman can prove they exist, Kyle would have to suck his balls. If not, Cartman owes Kyle $10 (kind of a lopsided bet, in my view). After stumbling upon one and later being transported to Imaginationland, the boys embark on a mission to save all the fabricated creatures from their evil counterparts in an attempt to cram as many awesome references as possible into three incredible episodes.

3. “The Losing Edge” – If you’ve ever heard someone yell out “I’M SORRY, I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA” while impersonating Randy, this is the episode they’re referencing. The boys are stuck playing baseball, a sport they all hate, and continuously try to lose games to no avail. Randy takes the “being a crazy parent at their kid’s sporting event” archetype a bit too far when he constantly gets wasted and fights fans of the other team at every game. Eventually, he meets his match when he takes on Batdad, and when the fight spills onto the field he gets the South Park team disqualified to the delight of the boys.

2. “Good Times With Weapons” – What if South Park tried an anime episode? Take the kids to the fair and let them buy ninja weapons, and you have your answer. Cartman creates an omnipotent persona for himself as the boys fight evil and other ninjas with their very real weapons. After Butters (as the nefarious Professor Chaos, who I hope appears in The Stick of Truth) catches a shuriken to the eye from Kenny, instead of taking him to the hospital and admitting fault they dress him up as a dog and try to take him to the vet.

1. “Scott Tenorman Must Die” – If there’s one episode of South Park that will always appear in a top whatever list, it’s this one. If it doesn’t, tell the person who made it that they’re wrong. Kicking off the show’s fifth season, this episode features Cartman being bullied by 9th grader Scott Tenorman. Mostly centered around money and pubes, Cartman gets trolled by Scott at every turn. That is, until he hatches the most brilliantly evil plan I have ever seen in action. It’s so evil that I could never do it justice by trying to explain. Click here and enjoy the deliciousness.

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, OPINION, TECHNOLOGY, TELEVISION Tagged With: butters, cartman, Comedy, Comedy Central, kenny, kyle, Playstation 3, rpg, south park, stan, the stick of truth, video game, xbox 360

Twitch Plays Pokemon – More Than Just A Game

by Tim Morris

Twitch, Manhattan Digest, Pokemon
Copyright Game Freak
Source: Reddit

Thousands of heads aren’t necessarily better than one.

How do you turn a groundbreaking classic into a massive social experiment? Allow tens of thousands of people to play the same instance at once. Using a ROM of Pokemon Red Version, the popular streaming website Twitch, and some clever mechanics, Twitch Plays Pokemon has taken the entire internet by storm. In nearly eleven days’ worth of play time, droves of people have entered the stream to participate, troll, or simply watch the madness unfold.

The idea for this undertaking came from an Australian person who chooses to remain anonymous. By entering the stream, people worldwide can take part in playing the game by entering any of the buttons that exist on the old-school Game Boy: A, B, Select, Start, Up, Down, Left, and Right. This, in turn, will make the Red character perform the corresponding action. However, since anyone can do this, the result is pretty much what you’d expect: chaos of epic proportions. It often takes hours to achieve anything significant in-game

While the creator has mostly been hands-off when it comes to moderating the action, they did institute a small feature to help the process along when the populace became stuck inside the Rocket Game Corner dungeon for over 24 hours. By typing either “anarchy” or “democracy” into the chat, players can move the needle towards whatever they choose. If the bar becomes 75% full (meaning towards the democracy side) the Red character will only perform the most requested action at predetermined intervals. Once the chat activated democracy mode, they were able to pass the floor puzzle and proceed.

Naturally, many memes and other wacky internet claims have already surfaced as a result of Twitch Plays Pokemon. The current team features a level 60 Pidgeot and five other Pokemon who are much weaker by comparison. As a result, Pidgeot has since been dubbed “Bird Jesus” by the inhabitants of the stream. The in-game item called the Helix Fossil, which normally would be resurrected into an Omanyte, has become something of a deity to the players involved. A simple Google image search of “Twitch Plays Pokemon” will yield some hilarious results.

If you’d like to watch this project in action, all you have to do is click here. In order to participate, you’ll need to make a free account on Twitch first, but once you’ve done that you can help or troll to your heart’s consent!

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT Tagged With: manhattan digest, pokemon, twitch

Flappy Bird’s Farewell- Manhattan Digest

by Tim Morris

We barely new ye, Flappy Bird.

Source - Gamespot
Source – Gamespot

Have you played Flappy Bird yet? If not, your chance is already gone unless you have a friend with it on their mobile device. The iOS and Google Play game, developed independently by Dong Nguyen of Vietnam, has been pulled from stores just as it was becoming huge. According to Gamespot, the game was pulling in over $50,000 worth in ad-revenue per day. The kicker? The game was completely free to play. Unlike other hugely popular mobile games like Angry Birds and Plants vs. Zombies, you pay nothing out of pocket to play it.

Flappy Bird gained notoriety for being an especially difficult game. It sort of plays like Robot Unicorn Attack in that it requires precision, but the controls of Flappy Bird are considered to be what makes the game the most difficult. Its “tap to flap” interface is exactly what it sounds like; tap the screen to flap your tiny wings and move upward, and do nothing to descend. The goal is to make it between as many gaps as you can before you hit a pipe. It’s a delightfully addictive design that made players push to improve their score, however it definitely took some getting used to.

There was some speculation that the game was taken down for copyright reasons. The pipes bear a striking resemblance to those that you’d find in old school Super Mario Bros. games, and the bird sprite used in the game does look somewhat similar to Piou Piou. However, Nguyen stated on his Twitter that this is not the case. If I’m a betting man, I’d say that he didn’t expect the game to get so big so soon, and can’t handle the workload. Thankfully, he has also stated that he will continue to make games and if he can take a simple design like this and turn it into big bucks, he’s a true credit to this industry. Nguyen clearly has struck gold with Flappy Bird and I look forward to playing what he comes out with next.

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT Tagged With: flappy bird, manhattan digest

Video Game Trolling 101 – Xbox One

by Tim Morris

Or, how to enrage Xbox One gamers from miles away.

Copyright Microsoft Source: Forbes
Copyright Microsoft
Source: Forbes

 

With the advent of online console gaming back in 2001 (yes, the first major console that could go online was the Sega Dreamcast in 1999, but let’s be real, it was pretty bad for what it was), the original incarnation of Microsoft’s Xbox changed the game forever. Two generations later, and we now have the Xbox One, with all its bells and whistles like the new and (allegedly) improved Kinect, apps, and voice commands. One of the main concerns with the voice command setup has been that another person could walk into a room where you were playing and start shouting commands that could potentially interfere with your gameplay. Now, some clever individuals have upped the ante on that inconvenience.

As a seasoned troll myself, I can always appreciate an artfully done prank. Taking the above scenario to the internet scene, trolls are now fouling up game sessions for others from hundreds or even thousands of miles away. How, you ask? Simple: by making their gamertags exactly the same as some of the voice commands, such as “Xbox Sign Out”, “Xbox Off”, or even “Xbox Bing”, to cue up the search engine feature. This alone isn’t enough to cause a disturbance of course, but given how juvenile and angry the Call of Duty community is, it’s easy enough to goad them into unwanted occurrences by bothering them in-game.

Of the possibilities, I think my favorite has to be “Xbox Bing.” What better way to both aggravate someone and give them a harsh reality check than to make them pull up their search engine and have all their profanities and other anger issues plastered on the screen right in front of them? This might be one of the first documented occurrences of internet trolls operating for the greater good. Having been in the online FPS community for about 12 years now, I’ve seen some of the worst of the human race. Not much makes people rage more than killing their character and then dancing on their corpse… until now.

As a small disclaimer, this post is not intended to make people stop playing Xbox One, Call of Duty, or anything of that nature. Do what you want to do. However, if you happen to see one of these jokers online, don’t fall into their trap, stay informed, and happy hunting!

Filed Under: ENTERTAINMENT, TECHNOLOGY Tagged With: bing, funny, humor, jokes, kinect, one, trolling, video games, voice commands, xbox, Xbox One

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